Jamie had a tough run on Bachelor In Paradise, being labeled a bonafide Stage 5 Clinger. He totally obsessed over Helena, and made some outrageous claims. For example, when he said he’d rather sit there and piss his pants, instead of leaving a conversation with Helena to use the bathroom. Creepy much?

Anyway, it appears we’ve found an even bigger desperado than Jamie. His name is Woody, and his desperate acts are just too hilarious. Listen below: