Call Off Search: Kyle Shows Up To Work After Going ‘MISSING'
“Stop looking I’m not missing.”
These were the first words that Kyle said into his golden microphone this morning during the opener of the Kyle and Jackie O show after a strange headline appeared in the newspaper this morning, claiming that the shock jock was no where to be found.
“If you read the paper today it’s as if Kyle has left the planet,” added Brooklyn.
This was news to Kyle’s cohost Jackie and the rest of the team, but according to an article in the Daily Telegraph today, Kyle had gone completely MIA.
“King Kyle MIA From His Realm,” read the headline. “Rating Loss Radio Jock Skips Usual Haunts.”
Of course before you start to panic thinking Kyle had actually been missing let us just kill the suspense for you and tell you that while it may have sounded like Kyle had been kidnapped and held for ransom, the reason he hasn’t been out and about recently is because he was sick and in bed.
Kyle explained this as he read out the so called “evidence” that the publication had about him being MIA.
The article claimed that Kyle hadn’t been seen at work or his usual hang out spots since the radio survey results were released on Tuesday and therefore believed that he had gone missing.
“There’s photos from all of the places I would usually be and it’s a big stamp across them all, ‘Not here, not here’. That’s right because I was home in bed,” explained Kyle.
The article even went as far as to quote a staff member from our team, known only as a KIIS FM insider, who they claimed had revealed to them that Kyle had told producers he would be away from work until Thursday.
“When the results came in Kyle was not very happy, but it is understandable,” said the alleged station insider to the publication. “Kyle did tell producers of the show that he would be back at work on Thursday but later changed his mind.
“Yesterday he said he would be back at work (today) but in reality no one is holding their breath.”
The report also said that they contacted the receptionist here at KIIS FM who reportedly told them that they were worried about Kyle as they hadn’t seen him for days.
“Sorry we haven’t seen him. I am worried. It’s been days,” wrote the publication, quoting the receptionist.
The investigation from the Daily Telegraph continued with them allegedly speaking to a barista at his usual cafe, staff at his King Kyle enterprises and even his radio fill in Beau Ryan to find out what had happened to him.
“Why didn’t they just go to your house and say, ‘Kyle are you there?’” asked Jackie. Good question Jackie…Good question.
Kyle could really do nothing but laugh when he read the article. And just like the time it was reported that Jackie was an a “starvation diet”, Kyle decided to tell his listeners what really happened when he was so called “missing”.
“Like I was missing for days…We all know I was just sick,” explained Kyle this morning. “I don’t get it, so they said I was sad and lonely…I’m not sad or tired I was sick.”
But just incase no one believed the words straight from his mouth, Kyle decided to debunk the “evidence” that the article had found to prove that he really had just been sick in bed and not missing. Listen to our own evidence in the video above!