The Story Of A Drunk Man With Two Live Fish Up His Bum
Good thing this story didn't come out before Finding Dory or poor Nemo would have been flushed down the toilet for an entirely different reason.
A man in China fronted up to a hospital complaining of stomach pains after one of the TWO LIVE FISH he STUCK UP HIS BUM began swimming up his intestines.
Obviously it took the unnamed bloke a while to 'fess up to doctors about whatever the heck it was he had been doing, but when he did, a quick X-ray confirmed that he had the makings of an aquarium in his lower gut.
The man, who was close to septic shock from the infection, was rushed in for surgery, where medical stuff found that the two fish (10 cm and 15 cm respectively) had broken through to his bowel.
According to Chinese news site Huanqiu, the local man had shoved the two pond loaches into his bottom because he was drunk; unbelievably, the TWO FISH ARE STILL ALIVE.
So is the man, by the way, and all three patients are expected to make a full recovery.